Bittersweet

Right, I called in last week to check on the status of my application with the orginisation previously stated. I got a bloke that sounded like he was having a bad day. Had a bit of an attitude, he did.

I asked him about the status of the app, and he said that they were not considering new applicants until the first of 2009. I told him that I had a curious question, if he didn’t mind me asking. So, I asked. "I have to take a few medications on a daily basis, so I was wondering if that would be a problem?"

"We generally don’t recommend that people join, if they have to take several meds due to problems of getting them into whichever country you would be selected for", he muttered as the sound of shuffling papers came through my earpiece.

"Does it depend on what kind of meds?"

“If you don’t mind me asking, what kind of health problems do you have?”

I gave him the facts, which I will not publish on the blog.

“To be frank here, why would you join when you have all of these problems.”

“I love to help people…I want to make a difference in this crazy world.”

“That’s very admirable of you, but you can make a difference locally without endangering your health.”

“That’s true, but I’m a rover…I love to travel.”

“They will consider your application with the utmost respect, when they are able to review it.  I can give you a website to find community programmes in your area.”

He seemed a bit clueless as to why I’d join the peace corps.  I let this wee conversation knock me down in the dumps.  I do not like to be faced with my own ailments.  I don’t really think about it.  So, when I’m slapped in the face with my own mortality, I get a bit melancholic.

I had a realisation Sunday night while out drinking with an old friend.  Two young women were sitting across from us at a table drinking (I was drinkin’ Guinness) shots of something.  They started arguing over who was comelier.  The scrawny blonde told the brunette that she was fat and laughed about it.  She got up to powder her nose, and the brunette, with graceful shoulders and lovely mocha eyes, started pulling at her blouse.  In my animated mindset, I leaned over and said, “She’s just jealous of your ravishing figure and brilliant smile”.

She pulled loose strands of long and wavy chestnut hair out from in front of her face and smiled. 

“Thanks”, she mumbled, as we toasted to her friends nuttiness. 

It turns out that we go to the same university.  Her friend came back and started talking to the lot of us.  She tried to get in with my wingman, but due to him being a hitched (married) chap, that was a no go.

To my point.  I will no longer let people pull me down to their level.  Words can be fatal, if you allow them to do so.  I’ve been called everything that I could possibly be called.  What they don’t realise is that I’m Jefferson effing Davis

Don’t let people push you around.  Laugh and walk away or stay and start a fray.  Thick skin is grand when one has a warm heart within.  Be tough!  :)

Numbers Game

Credit card companies have had a love affair with me for a long time. I pay my dues on time and usually add in a bit extra. I called two of my credit card companies today to close out the accounts. Below you’ll find the gist of the conversation:

“Hello, how are you today, Mr. Davis?” A cheerful bloke asks on the other end of the long wire that crosses the Rubicon.

“I’m grand, and yourself?” I ask him whilst putting my tea on.

“I’m great…thanks for asking”, says he with a bit of surprise.

“I need to close out the two credit cards that I have with your bank.”

“Might I ask why?”

“Because, I will no longer be under the grip of large corporations spreading their vile commercialization of everything I hold dear…”

“………………………………………………………………………………………………………….O……….kay’, he mutters during a long pause.

“That, and your interest rates are through the roof and I’m leaving the states for an indefinite amount of time”, says I whilst laughing.

“Interest rates, I can understand”, he jokingly replies

“By the way, what is your mother’s maiden name so I can access your accounts…?”

“Oh my God, don’t get me started….That question is a direct invasion of my privacy (pri-va-see)”, says I, whilst leaping from my desk chair.

“Sorry, we cannot access your account without it…Anyway, do you not mean privacy (pry-va-see)?”

“No, I mean Privacy (Pri-va-see).”

“May I have the maiden name, sir”, says he in a cheesed off tone.

“You’ve already got my DNA, so you might as well have me Mum’s maiden name, right?”

“Yep”, says he while snickering.

“If you don’t mind me inquiring, where are you going?”

“Here we go again…Ah, who am I kidding, they’ll find out anyway…I’m moving to Ireland for a minimum of three months but hopefully more, if I can secure a job and a visa.”

“Ah dude, that’s awesome…I’ve always wanted to go”, says the rep whilst getting excited.

“Save your money and come on over…I’ve got a friend that loves to show around sunglass wearing tourist…he’d even show you the bogs”, says I, as I started setting this poor chap up for a fall.

“Give me your email and I’ll email you some traveling tips and suggestions on places to stay”, sneakingly says I.

“That would be awesome…I’ve always wanted to go. My dad’s mother is from there”, says he as though we were making a brotherly bond.

“All right, I’ll give you your fist tip….”

“….Dude, go ahead…I’m psyched…I can’t wait to tell the wife”, says he while papers ruffle in the background.

“Okay, when you go into a pub in Ireland and you order your first pint of Guinness from the barkeep – make sure you call the bartenders, barkeeps…they will be insulted if you don’t – grab it as soon as he sets it down the first time…If he tries to take it from you, just wave him off and turn it up, froth and all”, says I whilst trying not to laugh.

“Thanks dude!”

I am mean and debt free! ;)

Genius Pint